The compost

I'm tired. i'm going to start with that. every single night now, despite what I did during the day, I get home and stay awake till 3 am on my laptop doing absolutely nothing. My bed is not comfortable at all, my room is completely void of anything decorative or welcoming and I'm always either too hot or too cold. Even when I do fall asleep at 3, without fail I wake up at 5 and throw my body around into a million different positions until I finally hit oblivion again. Alas, my roommate is up at the crack of dawn and makes noise similar to what it might sound like if we tried to pack the entire city of new york in our front hall. Either that or my apartment is toy story but rather than toys its my pots and pans that come to life? I should dig up some old Alex Mac DVD's and plan an investigation?

As for what i've been up to...well, sadly not a whole lot. I went to the bitter end on Sunday... alone... and watched the singer songwriter session. I had 2 free beers on the house and was bombarded by some nervous guy but the intrusion came with a free beer so I endured the senseless conversation to be nice. I also got up and sang a little tune with the house band but I was rustier than a nail lodged in the gutter of a haunted house. I honestly NEED to get to singing again. That was the great thing about living on my own... my apartment in ottawa, in comparison to this one i'm in now, was like Jasmin's palace and I had the liberty to do whatever I wanted.  I wailed alicia keys day and night in that apartment. Now I curl up in a tiny ball on a bed of springs with headphones on. it's mildly depressing. I also went to see revolutionary road... alone... and it was really good. I walked all the way home from union square without even realizing it because I was in such deep thought. I just barreled my way down the avenues in the brisk cold wondering how all our lives got so systematic? We are all so restrained by borders. Macro and Micro. The Macro being our governmental borders... municipal, provincial, national... obviously we are constrained in that regard. I can't even get a WORK visa in this city and I live 8 hours away. Then theres the micro borders of society. We constrain ourselves by relationships, jobs, family and housing. We get stuck in these tiny little bubbles. We work so much we are constrained by our fatigue. We have deadlines, bills, debt and doubt...all of which constrain us. Very few see beyond that. Many live cyclical lives where these borders go unnoticed and seem natural. They blend in with the general meaning of life. But since when should life be so SMALL? We literally have down to the minute deadlines on a regular basis. Down the the SECOND. "Have that report to me by Friday midnight" "Pay your bill by the 5th at 2:59 pm". There are 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour and 24 hours in a day. 7 days a week, 54 weeks a year and we live our lives worrying about milliseconds in a solitary day. I honestly do not think this is that way we were meant to live. We are slaves to the corporation. I can't stop dwelling on that. That is depressing to write about so i'm sure it's even more depressing to read about so I will move on to the compost!

The compost is simple, yet so COMPLEX. The compost is exactly what it is...a COMPOST but what separates this compost for other typical composts is that this particular COM-POSTE is smack dab in the middle of my apartment and it's in the from of an over sized plastic JAR. Why there is a need for a compost in the middle of an apartment the size of a master bedroom I do not have the answer to. Where this compost is emptied, I do not know. I am personally petrified to open the thing up in fear of what might jump out. I do not want to be attacked by a moldy eggshell or a flying zucchini saucer. In other news apartment related my house mate decided to put up a little piece of "art" on our otherwise completely WHITE walls. Below is both the compost and the new art. I am livin LARGE!

I was supposed to go to Kings of Leon tonight with Noah from live 88.5. He had free tix and was planning on coming to stay here in NY with me a few days in my compost artsy palace... BUT... like fate always has it... a massive blizzard coated the entire province of ontario causing cancellations across the board. Now two tickets are going to WASTE because the sky pissed snow all over the place.

I will say, in the midst of all this melancholoy I have embraced a temporary remedy. The office! If comedy is art, Steve Carell is Van Gogh. I love that show and the cast of the office have become my new best friends. Sad hahaha