It's 9:46 p.m and I think I am going to go buy myself a box of dark brown dye for my hair. I have not slept very much over the last 5 days as I have been drinking unreasonable amounts of liquor and celebrating life in a manner in which I don't believe to be typical of most 22 year old women. I am, however, not ashamed nor regretful of my actions I am rather more intrigued as to what it is that makes me happy about all this...or if it even makes me happy at all. Is it the drinking? I really don't think so. Then what is it? For one, I am unsure of how I feel about the people I live with and my job gives me the same sort of sensations one might experience while watching a clock alone in a tiny monochromatic room filled with nothing but air. I have been writing a lot of music lately but nothing I feel proud enough of to put on formal display. This being said, I am need of elevation and change. This is why I am heading on the College street car to pursue a box of dye.
9:53 p.m- Exhausted, somewhat delerious and even more so determined...I am heading off.
11:02- Home! In possesion! Getting in comfy clothes and putting on Noah and the Whale. i think they might eventually be my favorite band!
11:17- Dye no longer in its plastic container, instead... it is on my head...wrapped around every strand of hair I have...
While I wait for this toxic dye to annihilate my blond strands I guess I can try to explain this sudden urge. I say try to explain because I don't expect anyone to understand. It all started when I downloaded Wes Andersons "The Royal Tenenbaums". I watched it tonight for the first time. I fell in love with the characters and their individual personalities. I love idosyncratic intense behavior and complete radical acts of passion. It excites me the same way flowers excite my mother. I sometimes wish I was more into flowers myself, flowers seem easier... but since I just don't see the appeal in a traling vine I downloaded one of the most eccentric movies of my time. There is one scene where Luke Wilsons character shaves his head in an act of loveless rage. He shaves off all his hair and then subsequently shaves his beard off. I figured since he could do it so could I. I don't have a beard, but I do have unnaturally colored hair... so here I am 11:29 sitting on my bed with a soaking wet head and the promise for change!
11:30- Going to rinse as directed. I am out of my mind. Or just in touch with it? hmmm...
11:31- just realized I can't tell time. 10 more minutes.
12:21- blow dried and newly dyed! It looks awesome. I really like it. I do. Of course I am going to want it blonde again come the next solar eclipse but I am glad to have something new to look at in the morning! It'll be shocking for the first little while but like everything, I will get used to it.
I miss new york a lot. I had to mention that because its always on my mind.
As for the rest of my life well, I am having fun... making mistakes...learning from those mistakes...making them over again... and then learning a lesson even harder. I'm not much of a sponge when it comes to lessons but rather I am the lesson itself. Does that make any sense? Does to me... I think....
I am going to play around online a little. Maybe read up on whats happening in politics... I can't keep up these days. Obama has us all spinning....
night! xo
